So, you want to make a new friend – How do you go about it?
Let me be first to say that making a friend is all about having your guard down and being honest with who you are. If they won’t accept you for that, well they were never meant to be part of your life. A few key points on making a friend are as follows, but keep in mind – making a friend has a lot to do with connection and whether or not you both “click”. You both need to share similar interests and enjoy being within each others company is a must. Just be yourself, and enjoy who you are with and let it come naturally. If it is meant to form into a friendship – it will. Never force it. You will only be hurting yourself along the way.
When you pursue hobbies and activities you enjoy, you have a good chance of meeting people with similar interests. So check out that local new restaurant or grab a cup of coffee at a fun coffee house.
When you’re just starting to get to know someone, foster intimacy by talking about something deeper than sports, TV, or the weather. Once you two have been talking for a while, try a “fast friends” technique—basically each person gradually discloses something meaningful about him or herself. That opens the door for a more meaningful conversation that will lead to a potential friendship down the road.
While not everyone has the courage to actually do it, most of us know how to pursue a crush. Send flowers to their office. Invite them to dinner and a movie . Ask them to check “yes” or “no” under the question “will you go out with me?” Apply similar (but less romantic) tactics when pursuing a friend. For example, send the person an email or text asking them to lunch or extend an offer to grab a cup of coffee , and follow up afterward to say you had a fun time and you should hang out again.
Seriously. I am including smiling on this list because it’s very powerful and well benefited more than you may think. For one thing, smiling takes us out of our own head and makes us think more about the image we’re projecting. Plus, people who smile are perceived as more attractive, kinder, and happier, and therefore more approachable. Body language speaks volumes for itself.
Try and Try Again:
We pretty much know what it means when a romantic partner tells us, “It’s not you, it’s me.” But when you invite a new friend to coffee and they turn you down, don’t freak out and assume the worst. Maybe they really are busy with work; maybe something came up; never assume the worst. Be patient and just let that person come around when he or she has the availability. Be open to form new relationships with anyone you seem to cross paths with.
Be yourself, be confident, and just have fun.
Making a friend is one of the most exciting and rewarding pivotal moments in one’s lifetime. Friends help shape us to who we are and who we become. Making a friend is not supposed to be seen as work of any kind, its natural, mutual, fun, and so very rewarding.
Have fun with it.
Talk, relax, and get to know someone today.